Stop Self Sabotaging And Work With Yourself And Not Against
Every time we have something within our grasp, time and time again we find ways of letting it go, it seems many of us have been conditioned to self sabotage. Our brains have an almost inbuilt mechanism to always think the worst, from evolutionary terms it helped us to fear the worst to help to keep us save.
This practice of thinking the worst can have a negative impact on our lives, by thinking the worst we attract the worst, we often miss out on opportunities, it keeps us small and stuck. Self sabotaging can take us away from all that is good and what could be and instead it takes us down a path of self destruction and self defeating.
More often than not things are never as bad as we think, but just by imagining the worst case scenario we have to live the experience as if it was real as well as enduring the bad feelings in our minds and body.
For a change try and envisage things going well and working out and notice how different that makes you feel. There are always two ways of perceiving a situation, but sadly we only look and analyse the negative option.
Some of the signs of self sabotaging can be drinking to much, over eating or waking up feeling miserable and going straight into a self defeating mode. Do you feel your stuck in a rut which you cannot seem to shake yourself out of it. Do you worry what others think about you or how they perceive you because these are all signs of self sabotaging.
Sometimes when we worry what people think it is an underlying fear that we think they don't like us or we think we are not worthy or good enough. You know you can do better, self sabotaging can prevent you from succeeding at work or achieving your dreams.
This translates to a lack of self belief and worthiness, do you tell yourself statements such as I would like to do this but I can't.
We all know we are capable of achieving so much more, but most people cannot get through the self sabotaging blocks. We often try to improve our lives but for most of us we are just setting our selves up for failure because deep down we are expecting everything to go wrong, why? Because we have been conditioned by ourselves and by society to always think the worst first.
From a very early we are told unless we get good grades we will achieve little, people are born lucky, money comes to money and so on. Then we are criticised and told we are not good enough and then we conform to these limiting beliefs.
The real truth is we are so much better and more capable than we think or what we have been led to believe, but all to often we spoil our chances through our own tenancy to self sabotage.
How many times have you felt like you had things within your grasp but you allowed the old enemy self sabotage to come up with ways to snatch your new found happiness and optimism away from you.
Stop Letting Self Sabotage Hold You Back
Self sabotage often rears it's ugly head when attempt to change in any way, it can also force us to play safe which prevents us from growing and expanding. Self sabotage can cause us to give up on our dreams before we have given them a chance to even materialize especially if we hit any barriers.
It can make it hard for us to meet a new partner by preventing us from forming new connections, this can be fear engraved. Self sabotaging can hold us back in a job by stopping us from getting a promotion or advancing. It can even prevent us from changing our career because we opt for the safe option to stay where we are because we feel comfortable and safe.
Fear lies at the root of self sabotaging, it is the brains way of trying to protect us causing us to stick with what we have got because it already knows that is safe, the mind does not like the unknown or change and it will throw everything it can at you to stop you moving forward in life.
Our early programming as a young child can have a big influence and impact on our behaviours and how we respond to things and situations later in our lives. Self sabotaging is associated with negative emotions.
At some stage in our lives we have been conditioned either by others, by ourselves or by how we have responded to bad experiences that we are not good enough, we don't deserve better or we are stupid, failures and won't amount to much.
The brain will believe all these negative statements and recognises we are not confident or worthy enough. It will then use negative emotions whenever we attempt to step out of our comfort zone or if we try and change or improve ourselves.
You need to realize that the not worthy and negative part of you is not true it is a lie and it is just a program in your mind that needs changing and correcting. You were born worthy and lovable and you were bron with the capabilities to be or do anything you want.
You Are Unique And Special
We all live inside our own little world, everybody perceives things differently, the secret to ending your self sabotage is to realize that you are special and unique, you have hidden powers, resources and abilities that you just have not managed to tap into yet, but you do have them.
First stop believing that your old limiting beliefs are true, they are only true to you but you can learn to change the way you respond to them. Just because things have gone wrong in the past doesn't meant they will go wrong the next time.
We hold on to our negative thought pattens, this is our subconscious mind trying to prevent us from being hurt again in the future. Negative emotions are trying to tell us something, the natural approach is to try and resist, stop or repress our emotions however this never works, in fact it makes them even more stronger and by doing this you will never expand and grow stronger.
You have to learn to embrace your emotions, acknowledge the feeling and let it pass through you, accept the emotion then decide what your going to do with it. If you feel anxious tell yourself I am feeling fearful right now, how I want to be is calm and assertive.
If your having a bad day you can acknowledge how you feel and then say I feel a bit miserable right now but I have the inner resources to get me through the day.
Avoid negative, when we are facing a stressful event we tend to tell ourselves things like don't be afraid, however the mind does not register the don't and it only hears the be afraid.
Only focus on what you do want, if your feel a bit anxious about something tell yourself how you want to feel instead of thinking about what you don't want.
Embrace the feelings and reassure yourself what ever happens I'll be OK. Avoid all the negative words such as don't, can't and not. Learn how to calm and relax your mind, focus on your breathing and acknowledge and then ignore any negative feelings or thoughts. Start using some I can's or positive phrases , like I am strong, I am courageous, I am powerful.
Change The Way You Respond To Outside Influences
Where we go wrong is we let outside influences and problems affect our energy vibration, this causes us to slip into a negative vibration which causes us to perceive the problem as a disaster, the end of the world.
The first hiccup or obstacle we come across can totally derail us, we only see the negative and worse case scenario and we have trouble seeing the positive outcome beyond any setback..
Our primitive mind puts us in a state of stress and stress is linked to fear. Problems and emotions come and go, unless we prolong them by giving them constant attention, always have one eye on the solution but don't allow the problem to take control of you.
Sometimes we have to accept the current circumstances no matter how difficult or hopeless things first appear, yes it can be hard to swallow when things appear to be going wrong but the quicker you can change your vibration to a positive one then the better your chances are of quickly turning the situation around.
When Things Go Wrong Stop What You Doing And Take Some Time Out
When things go wrong, say to yourself I am going for a walk or I am going to listen to some relaxing music or do something you like doing. Our normal reaction to a mini crisis, is to start to tell ourselves everything's going wrong for me, nothing every works out.
This does not work or we blame everybody and everything, and things then just get worst, this is known as disaster thinking. What we should do is accept what's happened, laugh it off, take a break come back with a clear mind and move forward.
Then when you have calmed down start to reverse the problem, tell yourself things can only get better, everything will work out fine it always does, I can only improve, I am moving forward in the right direction, this is just a temporary setback, things are getting better, I am moving in the right direction, good things are coming to me, everything is always works out for me even if I am not in the right place at the moment and keep the positive momentum going.
We are either using the mind or we are being used by it and until we are present again and in the moment, we will have no true creative power as we are off following the the misguided mind.
Stop allowing your materialistic and self centered negative ego from blocking your way and suppressing the real you. There are many levels of the ego to dig through to realize your authentic true self.
Be proud of who and what you are and don't let the eagerness to impress others and to come across as this super perfect human being from masking your true identity and true self.
Your ego will do everything in its power to stop you from really expressing your inner personality, you will literally need to squash it in order to live your life as you are intended to do.
When we are experiencing negative or stressful emotions it means that our internal mind is not aligned with our external circumstances, there is a difference in perceptions and this means you need to change something in order to match your inner and outer worlds and bring them back into balance and harmony with each other..
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