Everybody has heard the old saying.
"You wait for a bus for ages, then two show up at the same time"
Sometimes the same scenario happens when you're trying to find love.
Where it takes ages to find a partner. Then, when you're dating, because you're out of the trying to hard and feeling desperate state.
All of a sudden, more opportunities seem to come your way.
When you're single and you're looking for a new love.
It can seem so hard to meet your true soul mate and the right person that is suited for you.
And it is important that you find somebody who is right for you.
Because you want somebody who is going to be faithful and somebody who is going to treat you nice and respect you.
Sure, there are plenty of ways to find a date these days and you may find that you can meet somebody.
But finding. Mr or Mrs right for you, can sometimes feel very elusive.
Far too many people seem to go from one bad date to another, whilst others seem to find it hard to find real love and companionship.
Science and relationships
1) Value and like yourself first
- I love myself
- I approve of myself
- I accept myself unconditionally
- I am good enough
- I am attractive enough
Learn to let go of your emotional baggage and all the negative comments and suggestions others have said to you about you.
Never allow others to diminish you or bring you down.
When you accept your weaknesses, stop putting yourself down and you build yourself up. Nobody can diminish you.
Don't chase love. Just be nice to you, be you, be happy, enjoy yourself without any conditions, and love will find you.
2) Be happy even when your single
Although it is your goal to find love, you must adopt the attitude of, you're going to be happy regardless whether
Yes you want a loving and lasting, fulfilling relationship, but you should never allow your happiness to depend on it or anybody else otherwise you will be heading for trouble.
The ironic thing is, when you're happy being single, you will shift out of that state of desperation, therefore you will find it easier to attract a partner, most people meet their ideal partner when they stop trying so hard and just go out and enjoy themselves.
There are several reasons for this, first if you're coming from a place of desperation, then you will be sending out the wrong signals which will repel a potential partner away.
Secondly, if you're not happy with yourself and you have a low self esteem then you run the risk of coming across as too desperate, needy and insecure, which isn't very attractive and it is the single biggest reasons why people fail to get what they desire.
Remember a relationship is a two way thing and they also have to love and respect you back, because when they do that then they will go out of their way to make sure the relationship lasts. But that won't happen if your insecure or you don't love and respect yourself.
When you do meet your true soul mate there can never be a place in your relationship for complicity or taking each other for granted.
Although a relationship is a two way thing and it is up to both of you to make it work, to keep your relationship alive act as if you're a hundred percent responsible for making it work
This will involve you making a conscious effort to meet your true love including working on your spiritual and emotional side as well as continuously working on your relationship,
Avoid allowing things to slip just because you think everything is fine when you have been together for some time because neglect is a relationship destroyer.
3) Write a love wish list
You can try writing a love wish list and many people claim this has been a major factor in finding their soul mate, but don't search for perfection and don't be too specific or picky because beauty and perfection only lie in the eye of the beholder.
Ideally, it is good to have things in common, but really your true soul mate should be your best friend and lover regardless of their hobbies and interests, and by being a bit more general you will widen your possibilities which will increase your chances of meeting someone.
Most people want a loving and responsible individual who operates in similar circles as they do, but even though you may find someone who has a lot in common with you and that can be a bonus, the solid foundations of all relationships should be built on love and not just because you both have things in common.
So one thing you can do is, you can write your soul mate wish list consisting of some of the things and traits that you like in someone and some of the things that you're looking for in a partner.
On your wish list you can write down some of the qualities that you're looking for, like the positive characteristics and personality type you're searching for, you can put them in order of importance if you wish.
Although you can add to your wish list things like looks and body type, again try not to be too specific because love and connection go way deeper than physical appearances.
By doing this, it will help to send out the right signals so you attract the person that you think would be more suited to your requirements and needs, your ideal soul mate does not have to share the same hobbies or beliefs as you.
4) Believe and trust that it will happen
Have total faith that it will happen, you need to believe your soul mate can hear you on a subconscious level, you must put out the right clear messages that you're ready to have the best chance of a quicker encounter.
If deep down you don't really believe in what you're doing, then you're not going to put out the right tone and a strong frequency.
You need clear signals of intent, you need to be totally sure without doubts so you avoid creating resistance and interference.
If you do your soul work halfheartedly, it will send out a weak signal, any doubt will lead to just hoping you will meet somebody, but there will be doubt and uncertainty, if you have any doubt you will repel the right partners away.
When you add emotion to what you're thinking about you tend to create that situation. This means when you're focusing on what you don't want or have your adding negative emotion to those thoughts and images you're creating in your mind and that can repel away the very things you want.
So only think about what you do want and paint a positive picture in your mind with a positive outcome, imagine how good your life is going to be when you have met your ideal soul mate. This also may mean letting go of the past and bringing yourself into the present moment.
Once you do this, get out of the way and just let it happen naturally, do not try to interfere with the process, the only thing you have to do is, follow your gut intuition and take action when you think it is appropriate.
Ideally you should match up with someone who matches your inner spiritual needs and desires, you should both get on well together and enjoy each, others emotional needs and company.
5) The first step to finding love is too learn how to love yourself first
The starting point
This may involve building your inner belief in yourself and correcting some of those doubts and insecurities that you may have, if you have an unloved part of you then you might find it hard to get a partner to love you back, therefore true love always has to start with you loving and respecting yourself first.
So if you don't have the love you want in your life, it could possibly be because you are not loving or accepting a part of you, another culprit is thinking negative or believing you don't deserve to be loved.
Self love means complete self acceptance of yourself, including your perceived faults, this means no more obsessing or worrying about how you feel about certain aspects of your body.
There is no harm in exercising and eating healthy to tone up your body, but anything you cannot change accept it and learn to love that part of yourself.
Start looking deep into the mirror to install some deep self love, look into your eyes and send
You might not like some aspects of your personality, perhaps you find it difficult to accept your anger, insecurities. If this is the case, learn to control your emotions.
If you have been constantly beating yourself up, self doubting, being overly critical about yourself and you have not given yourself the love and respect your inner being deserves.
To build your self love and respect requires daily practice, the more you do it the more windows of opportunity will flood into your life.
You may even think you're overly shy or too extrovert or there may be some other flaws you have that are stopping you from forming a relationship, but remember they are only perceptions and perceptions can be changed.
Some people even think they are just not cut out for the relationship game, this is not true, working on your confidence can improve your dating chances.
If you don't love yourself, then you will tend to rely on someone else to do it for you, when people have the reassurance that others love them, then this can
The problem with that is, you are not fixing the issue, what you are doing is relying on others to give you the self love that you have been denying giving yourself. It may be OK in the short term, but long term it can have a negative effect on your relationship as your insecurities start to surface.
The more attention you give to love, including loving yourself, the more your love will expand and attract love back, at the heart of you is an ocean of pure consciousness and consciousness is based on love, it is the foundation of all existence.
To find love on the outside you have to generate it on the inside first because they love you will find on the outside is a reflection of the love that is radiating from you on the inside and if you don't really love yourself, you still might attract a partner on a physical level, the problem is, sometimes you can attract the wrong type of person for you.
Because like attracts like, you may find that you will attract a matching partner who also does not love themselves either. In that case you will both be depending on each other to give out love.
6) Work on your physical appearance
Millions of romantic books about romance are sold every year, these books always depict a beautiful woman and a tall, dark, strong man, you might not find that fairy tale romance, but in reality finding love can be a lot easier than what you might think.
Although looks and physical appearance is not the basis of finding your true soul mate and not everybody is blessed with the perfect body and model looks, but everybody can do a bit to tone themselves up, dress smart and look the very best they can be.
People can spend many wasted years not liking parts of themselves, this attitude will have many detrimental negative effects on you and your life, but if you can start to accept and even embrace the whole you, both physically and spiritually then you can find that changes will happen fairly quickly.
7) Change your habits and behaviours
If you're not in your ideal relationship yet, then this could indicate that you need to take a good in depth and honest look at your habits, thinking patterns and
Sometimes we tend to blame everything on our circumstances and other people, but sometimes you have to examine yourself to try and figure out who you are and what made you, or what makes you think like you do and behave like you do.
Most of who we are today, is a direct result of our conditioning and experiences and the first thing you may need to do is to put all your bad relationship experiences behind you and change some of your old limiting perceptions.
All your failed previous relationships are not always the other person's fault, and we do choose to be with them in the first place.
When you start to see yourself as a nice worthy person you will begin to attract your ideal match, but maybe you need to change the type of person that you are normally attracted too otherwise you will carry on attracting the wrong type of partner.
If you want to find your soul mate, then maybe it's time to do things differently, so stop allowing your past failed relationships from depriving you of forming a new happy one, do not dwell on the past just try to learn something from it that will help you make your next relationship a success.
Because unless you stop making the same mistakes you will run the risk of ending up in the same old scenario again and again, so take something from your previous relationship and use it to improve your next one.
You don't have to put up with mediocre or second best either, because when you expect good things, then you will receive good things back.
8) Put yourself in the right places
Although you will need to work on building your inner confidence, your self worth and ditching all that negativity and pessimism, there will come a point where you might need to take action to finally catch your true soul mate.
It is possible that you may encounter a chance and random meeting, but sometimes you may have to put yourself in the right places.
This may involve socializing more, joining a reputable dating site, joining a night class, going to a singles bar or engaging on social networks, just be careful who you agree to meet with and where you meet up if they are a complete stranger.
On your first date or so, make sure you meet up where there is going to be other people around.
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Out with the old and in with the new ideal and more happier you