Conquer Your Fear And Anxiety And Reclaim Back Your Inner Calm And Peace Of Mind
However, for some the fear and anxiety can be so overwhelming they find it hard to face their fears.
Sometimes your existing fears can have an underlying root, for instance, behind some fears are low self esteem and
The origin of many of our fears and anxieties is
- Having a bad or negative experience
- A learned
- Overactive imagination/thinking the worst
- A fear of fear itself
Fear is an involuntary, automatic response
All our fears are, stored programs that are running in our subconscious mind and each one has its own neural connection which comes with and is attached to an active fearful and stressful energy and physical stressful response.
There are two types of fear, rational and irrational.
Most of people's fear and anxieties fit into the irrational category and all irrational fears are your mind and body, tricking you into believing and reacting as if something bad is going to happen, and they are very good at forcing you to avoid or escape from the things that you fear.
Every time the person is remotely reminded of the subconscious stimuli or trigger that is associated with the fear, then the fight or flight process will be automatically activated, meaning this reaction is involuntary and out of your conscious control.
If our fears operated on a conscious level, then it would be easy to get rid of them because we would be able to logically think them away.
But because they operate at a subconscious level, then this is why it's hard to reason with them, therefore you have to work on a subconscious level to overcome them.
Your subconscious mind works by responding to feelings, learned patterns of
When you have a bad experience, your mind will record and log all the data, including the time, place and what was in your environment, as well as the negative feelings and emotions that you experienced at the time.
Then, any time your mind is reminded of any of the associations from your bad experience, or a similar type of situation, then the part of your brain that deals with emotions and memories will automatically activate your fight or flight process.
This pattern will keep on repeating itself until your mind learns that the fear and anxiety are not appropriate.
With fear, you're dealing with feelings and emotions and it is the negative emotions that drive all the fearful thoughts and images, so to overcome your fears you will need to change the feelings.
Starve your fears of their fuel
Most people in their desperate attempt to get rid of their fears, spend a lot of their time fixating and obsessing about them and how they feel, to a point where they almost expect to feel anxious.
But, the least you think about your fears, the better, because the more you think about them the more you will strengthen the neural connections and the more fear you will add to the thing or situation.
Fear and anxiety can consume so much of your attention that you end up becoming afraid of the fear and the emotions and feelings associated with it.
The truth is, thinking about your fear will make it worse, what you have to ask yourself is, has
You see, any attempt to think away, resist or try to get rid of your fears will only result in making your fear and anxiety worse.
Because every time you focus on your fears or anxieties you will be feeding them with the fuel that it thrives on.
The way to treat fears is, to change the feelings and to condition your mind to accept that the feared thing is not dangerous, but you're never going to change the way you feel or respond if you're still offering any resistance to your fear.
Back in prehistoric times when the dangers were plentiful, fear was vital to keep humans safe, we learned to fear anything that had previously threatened us, or anything that was unknown to us.
This process was critical for the early survival of humankind, and to further improve our chances of survival the brain soon quickly learned how to err on the side of caution and put safety first.
After all it was your subconscious mind's job to keep you alive, so your brain learned that it's better to be safe than sorry.
Fast forward a few thousand years, we have evolved, but unfortunately the primitive part of our brain that deals with danger, emotions and the fear process hasn't evolved with the times.
This very still primitive part of our brain still operates on the same basis as it did in the early stages of our development.
The part of the brain that controls the fear network and responses, which has access to all our emotional memories, our automatic emotional and physical responses, our risk assessment what if thoughts and our rapid decision making unfortunately does not deal with or respond to logic.
You will become even more aroused to fear, at times when you are experiencing high levels of stress, tension or anxiety.
The downside to the fear process, is our minds cannot distinguish between what is a real threat, what is an imagined threat and what is a non threatening situation, and your mind can associate anxiety to just about anything or any situation.
Avoidance tactics will justify the fear
Avoiding any of the situations or things that you respond with fear to will not work either as what you avoid you learn to fear more, so every time you avoid something because you're trying to get rid of your fear, then you're actually reinforcing it.
Fear can be very powerful and persuasive, it will try and make you avoid the thing that you're scared of, but when you avoid it, then your mind will interpret this as the fear is justified, otherwise why would you be avoiding the thing or situation.
You should never attempt to try and get rid of your fear or your fearful thoughts, because when you do this then your mind will see the, fearful thoughts and scenarios, the feelings and the sensations of fear as the threat and it will then push you into an internal battle with your fearful thoughts and feelings.
The problem for you will then be, your mind will use fear to push you into a battle with your fear and anxiety.
So, effectively you will end up getting consumed in a daily war with the fear, and you will be using fear to fight fear, that's a bit like chucking petrol on a fire and hoping to
In the end people become more lost and emotionally involved with the fear itself than the original source of it.
When you go to war with fear and you make it your mission to defeat it, then your mind will start to use fear to fight the fear and it will keep on using fear to push you into a never ending battle that you cannot win. What you must do is learn to tame the beast instead of trying to force it away.
You see, your mind will get to see that the sensations of fear and those fearful, anxious thoughts as the enemy that needs defeating or avoiding which will suck you into a vicious loop of more fear, anxiety and stress.
Therefore, not only will you be afraid of the original things and situations that started the fear you will also be afraid of the fear itself.
When you fight fear it will fight back harder, when you avoid fear, run from or you allow it to dominate you then it will control you.
But when you start to embrace it and welcome and you change the way you respond to it, then it then it will have no answer to that and you will start to restore inner peace.
Some of the most common fears are
- Fear of failure
- Fear of your anxious thoughts
- Fear of rejection
- Fear of fear itself
- Fear of making a mistake
- Fear of embarrassment
- Fear of a certain thing, situation or object
- Fear of something bad happening (As in OCD)
- Fear of the unknown
- Fear of being judged
- Fear of what other people think
10 Tips To Help You Overcome Your Fears
There are generally several things that you need to do to reduce your fear and anxiety because overcoming your fears and anxiety is a process of things and making some lifestyle changes that need to be followed.
To start with, it's important that you know that at times it's perfectly natural to feel afraid, so the more you can be comfortable feeling uncomfortable the stronger you will grow and the balance of power will start to shift back in your
1) Do not always trust your imagination
Because most of people's fears are irrational and there is usually no logical reason for us to be afraid, after all your mind cannot predict the future even though it will try to project what might happen.
Our minds are very good at predicting and over exaggerating the negative and the worst case scenario whilst always turning a blind eye to the possibility of things going well.
In most cases, nobody knows what is going to happen, this suggest that the fear and danger only really exist in the mind and our sometimes overactive imagination.
The problem with the imagination is, it triggers sensations of fear which appear very real to us. Why we usually feel anxious is because we think we cannot cope or handle something.
When we have to face a challenging or fearful thing or situation, our mind will try to make sense of the situation and it will play a little scary movie within our minds that will depict what could go wrong.
This will activate the fight or flight stress response, which cause more fearful imaginings which can make us act and behave as if what we're imagining happening is true and real and thus we must try to avoid the thing or situation or take preventative action.
The more you become emotionally involved with these imaginings and the more you dwell on them, the more fear you will attach to the thing or situation and the more you will be conditioning yourself to be afraid of the thing or situation.
So by the time you have to face the thing or situation for real you will have probably worked yourself up into a nervous wreck and you will probably have to endure high levels of anxiety.
So now that you know you cannot always trust your imagination, try to be more mindful and teach yourself not to get hooked up in the fearful images and emotions of your imagination.
You can learn how to observe your imagination whilst staying calm and detached, because you cannot stop the fearful imaginings, but you can practice changing the way you react so you stop all the stress and further anxiety.
Or imagine you have already been through the thing that is scaring you and everything has gone well and you have handled it well and you've come through it safe and secure.
So instead of just allowing your imagination to scare you to death all the time, turn the fearful energy around by getting into the habit of imagining things going well.
2) The what if thoughts
If you're having those anxiety what if thoughts and all those what happens if scenarios, then it is your mind doing a risk assessment.
This is like your minds, advanced early warning system to try and alert you of any potential risks or threats.
Your mind is basing these responses on how you have previously handled and responded to a negative or bad experience or what it perceives could be potentially dangerous.
Although those what if thoughts are annoying, they can serve a worthwhile purpose if you were in a situation where there were potential real hazards ahead.
However, most of the time the what if questions are about things that are non threatening or very low risk.
The way to react to those what if thoughts is to immediately reply with so what or turn the negative and fearful responses into positive energy by turning the what if negative thoughts into positive what if's like, what if everything goes well, or replace them with something more positive and realistic.
3) Change the feelings
Because all of our fears and anxieties are negative programs that are running in our unconscious mind, then if you want to overcome your fears you have to operate on a subconscious level.
This is why logic and thinking rarely work on reducing your fears, the thing is fear is a learned
Sometimes when you react with fear it is accompanied by anxious thoughts, sometimes you will just get a direct fearful response.
Most people think that it is the anxious thought that they have to deal with, but the thoughts are not the real problem, it is the fearful emotions that are attached to and what come with the thoughts that are causing you all the pain and grief.
The powerful bad feeling, emotions come before the thoughts, therefore it is the feelings that you need to change.
And again, in some situations you will just get the fearful feelings and responses without the fearful thoughts.
So what you need to change and work on is the way you feel and the way you respond, because whether you're just reacting with fearful feelings or there are some fearful associated thoughts the feelings and the responses you will experience will be the same.
So whether your fear is being triggered by your anxious thoughts or by an outside stimulus, it does not really matter because you treat them both in the same way.
Our emotions play an important role in our survival, and when you're having anxious thoughts or fearful responses, it is a message being relayed from your unconscious mind because your unconscious mind thinks you could be at risk.
You could say, anxiety is when your mind thinks that something bad could happen to you in the future, whilst a fearful response is when your mind things a threat is imminent and something bad is about to happen.
However, when you're in a relaxed and peaceful state, then your mind will think you're safe, so you will begin to feel less threatened and you will switch back from survival mode to safe mode.
The secret is all about managing and changing your state. To overcome a fear, at some point you have to confront the thing you're afraid of, so long as the danger is not real.
This means, that you have to face your feared thing or situation, despite how you feel and you have to stay put until the fear subsides so you force your mind to accept the fear is false and unnecessary.
Fear is just a shift in energy and a change in your physical state, so instead of calling fear, just describe it as energy.
The trick is to catch it early, because if you leave it too late then it will result in high levels of anxiety and panic.
Do not try to suppress or resist your anxious thoughts and feelings, because that will increase the fear and stress. Also, do not be alarmed, frustrated or bothered by your thoughts and feelings.
The moment you notice the rise in anxiety, embrace it, let you know, that it's just thoughts and feelings which cannot hurt you, and see it as nothing more than a shift in energy.
Learn how to observe your mind and your feelings, but do not panic or want to escape or avoid the situation.
Allow the emotion to rise, and let it travel up through you and away, if it comes back, just repeat the process.
You can also, fill your mind with happy tunes or melodies that evoke positive feelings as you notice the fear building up, because it is the feelings and the
As long as you catch it early and you do not try to stop it or fight it, then the feelings will quickly subside, the more you do this the lower and shorter the duration and intensity of the fear will be.
Other tactics that you can apply are, try tricking your mind into believing all is well and you're safe and secure. You can do this by giving your mind some positive feedback.
One way that you can condition your mind to accept there is no real danger so the fear isn't needed, is by using your body to act as if everything is OK, just as you would if you were in a safe situation.
The thing with most fears are, it's not real, but you are living it as if it is real because of how you're responding to the feelings.
To get what you want or to overcome your fears you have to face them and move through them and beyond them, and the way to overcome your fears is to change the feelings and responses.
You can use your body to mimic all is well, in all those times and situations where you would normally react with fear.
When we are faced with a perceived threat, adrenaline is released into our body and this triggers all the other symptoms of stress, where our muscles tighten, our heart rate increase and our breathing becomes shallow and rapid.
So when you start to feel anxious or fearful, release the tension and relax your muscles and shoulders, breathe deeply, making sure the out breath is longer that the in breath and put on a big smile, because
If you're having those anxious thoughts, do not try and suppress them or force them away, just see them as thoughts.
If you feel anxious about a forthcoming situation, you can reassure yourself, by relaying back some safety messages to your unconscious mind, by telling yourself things like.
" That could happen, but it's not going to harm me, so the anxiety is not needed"
" It's not going to kill me, so
"Whatever happens, I'll be OK"
"I can handle and cope with that"
" I am safe and secure in this present situation"
When you're having them let your mind think the fearful thoughts.
Just let you know that they are just thoughts and leave your mind alone to carry on thinking the fearful thoughts, because fearful thoughts and feelings only persist if you resist them.
- Observe the thought
- Acknowledge and accept the anxious thought
- Ignore and take no notice of the anxious thoughts and let them pass on by, or change them
4) Bring yourself back to the present moment
The first thing you have to understand about fear is that it's not real, all fear is your mind presenting you with false evidence and you are reacting to these perceptions and that's all they are, as being true.
All fear and anxiety is, it's your mind playing tricks on you. To stop your mind from playing tricks you have to become mindful of what is happening, the place where fear cannot reach you is when you're in the present.
You see fear is your mind projecting
What fear is, it is not real, it's just an imagined outcome or possibility. Your mind is trying to keep you in your comfort zone, but to grow, you have to face your fears, embrace your fears and step out of your comfort zone.
Otherwise, your fears will keep you stuck, limited and even cause you to keep on retreating until you end up confined to your own home. Fear makes you think that something bad is going to happen in the absence of any real danger.
Your mind does not know what will happen, the part of your mind that deals with fear only know's what has happened in the past and its basis all its reactions to everything that has happened in the past to determine how you respond in the future.
The truth is you neither live in the past or the future, you live in the present so you need to remain in the present, so do not live your life based on the past and take no notice of your mind when it tries to second guess the future.
If your feeling negative feelings, then this means you have either ventured out of the now and you have gone into the future or the past.
So the first step to overcoming your fears, which are nothing more than noises and images being played out in your mind, is to get in the present and stay there as much as possible and you cannot stay in the present when you're worrying about the future.
What has been happening is, you're living your life in the physical world, yet you are responding with fear to your inner reality which is nothing more than an illusion.
5) Reduce your stress
Although fear and anxiety is mainly a mind programming fault and a learned
Stress is closely linked to fear, so when you're feeling stressed this can signal to your mind that something bad is about to happen, so your mind will scan for the threat and anything it remotely associates as being dangerous it will respond with fear.
At times when we are feeling stressed or if our bodies are tense, then your mind will interpret this as, something bad is about to happen so it will search through your database to see if it can find that threat based on your previous emotional memories.
The more relaxed your body is, the better, when you reduce your stress and you learn how to relax your mind and body, then you will feel less threatened in your surrounding environment and you will find it easier to deal with stressful situations.
Fear is a physical state, what you want to be feeling is those calm and good feeling emotions, exercise is one way of dealing with the physical side of things, and deeply relaxing will prevent you from slipping into a stressful and anxious state so much.
Why people stay stuck in a fearful and anxious state is because their body is always in a heightened and stressful state, causing your emotional mind to become more aroused and alert to danger.
When you're feeling stressed and tense all the time, your mind will perceive your environment as a dangerous place and you will feel more threatened and you will find it hard to handle and cope.
But when you shift your energy and state back to calm and relaxed state, then your mind will think your environment is more safer and it will begin to start to shift off the fear process, leaving you feeling less threatened and more able to deal with those once challenging situations.
They never really relax enough to stop all that constant release of adrenaline that trigger all the other physical stressful symptoms so their body stays stuck in a stressful and fearful state.
Do not try to battle with your feelings, at times when you're feeling negative emotions, let yourself know I do not have to deal with these feelings right now, I am just going to let theses feelings subside, they will pass soon, let you know, "I am safe so I don't need to anything right now".
Then, once they have passed
This is why meditation is so beneficial, scientific reports after scientific reports have proven how good meditation is for anxiety and fear.
6) Change Your Self Talk
Most of our fears and worries are not logical yet we still allow the inner child and the none logical fear network to run our emotional responses,
Our minds create the fear and we keep trying to avoid the imaginary fear or we want to run from it. But the reality is, most of the time there is no real threat or very little risk, yet we still keep getting hooked up in the fear circuit and cycle.
But you can use your logic and intellect to challenge and change your fears, beliefs and worries.
After you have been through a fearful moment, let you know, that hurt, but I am alright, praise you up for being courageous.
Ask yourself, what logical reason was there for why you felt anxious, and just try and break the belief behind the fear.
Positive self talk can be a good strategy to feel better about yourself and help you to change the way you respond.
If you dread something change your inner dialogue too, I am looking forward to, I like, I enjoy or I love.
Your subconscious will offer some resistance to start with but be firm with your internal voice until you override the old beliefs.
Begin to challenge and change your false fears and beliefs, ask yourself what's the worst case scenario, tell yourself things like I can handle that or I can do that.
Boost your self esteem by saying positive things about yourself, including telling yourself repeatedly that you like yourself.
Whenever you feel fear, switch the energy over and focus on what you're thankful for instead. If you're dreading giving a presentation be thankful for the chance to speak in front of others.
7) Help To Face Your Fears
If you're going to get over your fears, then at some point you're going to have to face all the situations or things that cause you to react, avoiding or walking away from the situations or things that cause you to respond with fear is not an option if you want to defeat your fears.
To successfully cure your fears you have to sum up the courage to stick it out until the feelings subside, when you let the fear give in before you, then you are on the road to recovery.
If you have a deep down negative emotional memory that is behind and driving your anxiety and fears, then you may need to do a bit of emotional work so you can disassociate the fearful attachment and connections.
For some people their fear is so crippling and overwhelming they find it too unbearable and hard to face their fears.
If you want help to quickly gain control of your high levels of anxiety and emotions within a minute so you can quickly change your state and bring yourself back to feelings of calm and control, then there is a new program called the 60 second panic solution! T
It can be of great comfort and relief for some people to have a technique that they can apply in those in the moment panic situations, that will bring down your anxiety levels instantly.
This can give you the confidence and self control to go out and face those previous difficult situations, which will enable you to confront all your fears one by one, so you can process the emotion and change your associations and responses.
Other more traditional ways to bring down the intensity of fear are listed below, these work better when you have a specific thing, object or situation that causes you to react with fear.
8) Use your body to reduce your anxiety levels
Many people think the way to treat their anxiety is by fixing the mind, and although your mind is a powerful tool and you will have some bad memories, emotional attachments and negative beliefs that will need changing.
You should also, not overlook the importance of your body. Most of the sensations and symptoms of anxiety are chemical and physical changes that are happening in your body, therefore you can use your body to lower your anxiety.
Fear and anxiety are a physical state, where your body being prepared to either fight, avoid or run away from a perceived threat.
Because of the mind and body connection, this means that your mind and body are tied in and linked together.
What this means is, your body responds to your mind, and it does this very quickly, but also your mind will react from the feedback it receives from your body.
Our posture and muscles are linked to the fight or flight process, when our body is out of alignment and balance our muscles will tighten up.
Slouching, or having a bent forward rounded posture, is a negative energy
A tense, rigid and stiff posture is just as bad as slumping because it is associated with fighting, defensive and aggression. If you suffer with anxiety, then you can have a tendency to either shrink and go small, or you might tense and stiffen your posture.
Because of the fight or flight connection, your mind will interpret both of the above postures as your about to be threatened or something bad is about to happen
When your neck, shoulders and upper back are tight and
Tension in mind and body can send you into the survival mode because muscle tightness is strongly linked to the fight or flight process, when our bodies are tense our state and thought processes can change to more tense types of thoughts.
Tense muscles or the physical sensations that are associated with stress will flip your mind over into your negative files and data, this is where all the data for your past bad experiences are stored.
Try to adopt a nice open, but relaxed and aligned, balanced posture, so you are sitting and standing with the least amount of strain and tension.
Remember, that your body posture, and your physical state is directly linked up to your thought patterns and your emotions.
When you're aligned and balanced, you will feel more relaxed and comfortable, your circulation and your breathing will be better and your chi energy will flow freely around your body.
9) Visualization to change your energy
You can also use visualization in two other different approaches. First, you can practice at least once a day creating your very own safe haven, spend five to ten minutes imagining yourself feeling relaxed in a place of calm, peace and serenity like a tropical beach, walking through a meadow or beach by a lake.
You can either return to a time or place when you were feeling deeply relaxed or you can make one up and imagine yourself in a place where you feel completely relaxed, safe and secure, engage all your senses.
Or you can do it whilst you are deeply relaxed, such as when you are meditating, just keep focusing on how good you feel and how calm you are, make your ideal location your safe and secure sanctuary, then magnify the good feelings to make this even more powerful.
An the onset of any fear or build up of stress, go virtual and imagine yourself in your safe and ideal place, but remember to involve all your senses, this can calm you down and help you to replace fear with feelings of calm in those stressful situations.
Another exercise that you can do is, imagine how much better your life will be without your fears, work on one at a time and clearly imagine and visualize in clear detail with emotion how much better your life will be when you have released your fear.
10) Eat Healthy Nutritious Foods
Some people get stressed and anxious because of a vitamin deficiency, your diet is important so if you suffer with stress and anxiety, then it may pay you to cut back on high sugar or junk foods, caffeine and alcohol and eat a more healthy and varied balanced diet.
The vitamins that can help anxiety are the B complex and magnesium, if you take a supplement then make sure you stick to the recommended daily dosage, also make sure you stay hydrated.
Also make sure that you do not dehydrate, because when you're dehydrated you will go into survival mode, drink often but not excessive in one go.
To sum things up,
- Do some regular exercise
- Take up meditation to reduce your stress and anxiety
- Have a relaxed and aligned tension free balanced posture
- Calmly observe your fearful thoughts and feelings
- Do whatever you
can to makeyou feel good
- Breathe correctly (regularly take some slow, deep breaths during your day)
- Live a healthy life and eat a well balanced diet
- Do not dehydrate
- Think positive or neutral good feeling thoughts
- Do not think about or focus on your fears or anxiety
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