Self Help Fix

Knowing Yourself Welcome To The Real You

When your body is balanced and working in harmony and your mind is still and you're experiencing the positive and calm emotions then that is the real you. 

Only when you're calm and balanced on the inside will will reflect the image of the real authentic you on the outside. 

An example of this would be, if you look into the mirror and you see a sad reflection of yourself, you cannot go over to the mirror to put a smile on your face, the only way to make that outer you smile is to do it from within. 

Most people have lost touch with their true selves due to their focus of attention and the worries, stresses and strains of everyday modern life.

If you see your mind as the surface of a lake, then when you're in a negative state of resistance the surface of your mind is choppy and rippled. But when you feel tranquil and at peace then the surface of your mind will be still like a mirror and you will be at one with yourself and your world.

Many people only perceive themselves as a physical being existing in a material world. But if you only see yourself from a physical existence and perspective, then your happiness and your inner state of being will be a condition of your successes, achievements and the amount of material possessions that you amass. 

Most individuals live their life by other people's rules and beliefs, then to make matters worst they allow their past experiences to control their now and their future. 

We are told what is perceived as normal and the right way to live our lives, we follow the path of everybody else and we are bombarded with magazine and film images of super confident people and models with perfect looks and bodies, no wonder people feel inadequate and they have a low self esteem.

Find peace and tranquility within 

People chase and seek things in their outer reality to help make them feel better, everything you do and want is geared around making you feel good and life is all about feelings and emotions, learn to manage your emotions and you will have a great life.

However, when you rely on what happens in the material world to make you feel good you will be totally reliant on what comes along and you will be living your life be default instead of creating a life of your choice. 

This one way lens of perceiving yourself and your world will leave you at the mercy of luck, chance, and other people's beliefs and the negative conditioning that you have bought into, where you allow your situations, circumstances and other people to control your inner state. 

The real truth is, you already have everything you need to make you feel good within because confidence, strength and inner peace and happiness can be obtained within without relying on any outside things apart from your basic human necessities and needs.

Talk to yourself and be nice to you

Talk to yourself, be kind on you and start to make peace with yourself because the truth is, you are your own best friend and mentor.

Your emotions act as a guidance system, they let you know when you're veering of course or your focusing on things that you don't want or things that upset you and make you feel bad.

It is important to be mindful of what your emotions are trying to tell you, so start to pay attention to your inner guidance and learn how to understand your emotions.

Are you happy or sad, stressed or anxious, or are you feeling fed up and bored, if you're experiencing negative emotions or you feel stuck, ask yourself questions, such as, how can or what can I do to, then state your problem or how you feel.

If things are not going well,  don’t beat yourself or dwell on what you lack, because that just makes things, let you know you're doing your best, and then focus on, or work on the opposite to what's making you feel bad.

Your thoughts and feelings are not the real you, and if you're having negative or unwanted thoughts or feelings, then all you have to do is, stop engaging and trusting your thoughts. 

Step back from your thoughts and feelings so you're in a place of calm detachment, and just peacefully become the conscious observer and not the emotional follower and slave to them.

Do more of the things that make you happy, enroll in an evening class, do some of the things that you want, instead of doing what others want you to do all the time, read more or pursue your interests or follow your passion.

Because your own happiness and well-being is the most important thing for you, meditation is a great way to boost your happiness and bring stillness to your mind and calmness to your body, leaving you free to be your true authentic self.

Doing this, will help you increase your happiness levels, so you can unlock the true you,  as you begin to explore your true potential as you begin to put your troubles and worries to one side so you can start to understand yourself better. 

Only when you are able to understand yourself better, you would be able to understand others too.

Free yourself of negative baggage and petty outside influences, so  you can clear your mind and then you can start to discover who you really are.

Most people try to make the changes they want on the outside, they seek what they want on the outside, but you shouldn't let your outside world control your inside, but the best way of doing things is to let your inside control your outside. 

Your outer reality is a mirror of how your thinking and feeling within, in essence, you are a projection of your energy within, so try to only project positive and calm feeling emotions.

When you let your outside world to negatively control your inner spiritual being then you will separate yourself from who you truly are.  You can only see all that is and can be good about you and your life when you stop focusing on all that is bad. 

Overcome your insecurities

To unleash your true confidence and potential,you need to deal with all those little insecurities that are holding you back. 

Most people are burdened by fear and anxiety because they seek security, but security is fear, you cannot have complete security so focus on the things you do want instead of worrying about the things you don't want.

Who you really are is your choosing, yet many people allow others and their past mistakes and failures to mold and shape who they are.

But you should not judge yourself by your past mistakes or failures or by the labels and tags other people have given you, just learn from them and grow. 

Because you should determine who you are, if you feel under confident then it is because you're choosing to feel under confident.

If you want to break free of your insecurities then decide your awesome, great and you are as good and equal to anybody else, so tell yourself this regularly and praise yourself instead of wanting to seek approval from others.

Tell yourself how great and awesome you are and you do not have to find reason or any evidence to support these statements ether. 

Also write a list of all the things you're good at, no matter how small or insignificant they seem, that's irrelevant because it does not matter how big or small the achievement is, it is the good feeling that you're searching for. 

Start to admire yourself, have some self respect and admiration for yourself, you don't need a reason to admire yourself, if you cannot think of anything to praise or admire yourself make it up. 

Fear is just an illusion, and even though most of your insecurities are not real life threatening risks, as far as your mind is concerned all your insecurities resolve around the potential risk death, if you feel anxious your mind thinks you're in danger. 

When you stop fearing death and you stop being afraid of fear itself, then there is nothing left to be afraid of.

Start to be your true authentic self, you do not need to improve because creation made you and creation always gets it right, just aim to be the best version of yourself. 

Instead of limiting yourself because of your old beliefs and your past bad experiences, focus your efforts on personal growth and development.  

Start to pursue your desires and passion so at least you know when you get to the end of your life you will have no regrets.

You cannot access your true authentic self and you cannot be the person you want to be if you are using self destructive thinking patterns and negative and critical self talk, you will never be at peace with yourself if you do not accept yourself and appreciate yourself unconditionally.

Tap into your true potential 

 Focus on who you are

Focus on who you are and let go of everything that has happened to you in the past because there is no point in going down memory lane if it keeps on causing you pain.

To take it a step further, let go of what is and put all your attention onto what can and will be, because the past has gone and the only thing that should matter to you is for you to enjoy and appreciate the moment and think about all the good that is coming your way.

Your past negative experiences and your worries about the future if you allow them too will rob you of your natural calm, balanced and happy energy state of being, but no matter what has happened to you, nothing can take away your good feeling emotions if you choose to control your thinking and how you choose to respond.

We all go thought painful and upsetting experiences some worse than others, but once the bad experience is over it cannot hurt you again unless you choose to return to the memory, you relive it and you dig deeper into the bad situation. 

Most of the things in life that we worry, stressors, fear and dread rarely ever happen, most of our fears and anxieties are fueled by situations that pose us, no genuine threat. Yet every time we respond badly to our external events and circumstances, it affects our energy.

The two important things you need to get right are your physiology and your focus of attention. So you need to be mindful to whom you feel and anytime you're experiencing negative emotions you have to ask yourself? 

How are these events and circumstances affecting how you feel, and if there is something that is affecting your emotional and physical state and making you feel bad, you need to again ask yourself is there any worthwhile point in carrying on giving it your attention.

If what you're thinking about makes you feel bad, the general rule is, don't go there, you need to establish if what you're thinking about is destructive and diminishing your self esteem and your self worth or it is helping to increase both of them as well as moving you towards who you really are and what you really want to be in your life.

If what you're giving your attention to is making you feel good, then carry on thinking about it or choose similar pleasing thoughts because the key to a happy, successful life is to learn to enjoy your thoughts and if what you're thinking about is not taking you to a place where you want to be then it's time to change your focus.

If you begin to feel bad then you will need to make some adjustments to what you're giving your attention to because you have to practice stopping doubt and negativity before it gathers momentum.

Most of the time our outside circumstances are irrelevant, because we always have new choices and opportunities to feel good about and to be optimistic about so long as you don't allow what's happened or the opinion of others to control your energy.

Although it's important to enjoy socializing with family and friends, if you feel bad or unhappy when your alone then it maybe time that you started to like yourself and you begin to enjoy your own company.

Change your self image

Your self image plays a massive role in who and what you are. Our self image is formed over many years of conditioning by others and ourselves and unfortunately a lot of that conditioning is negative and untrue.

Your subconscious mind the part of you that controls most of your thinking and behaviours, believes everything you say or think to yourself, it is also influenced by the opinions of others. 

Bit by bit throughout our lives we form our belief systems about ourselves and how we perceive our world and from those beliefs we create an image of ourselves, which determines our characteristics, personality and how we think, act and behave.

When you buy into the criticism and the nasty comments said by others or you allow your mistakes, failures and your negative bad experiences to begin to influence your thinking, then you will start to believe what they say as being the truth. 

Not only will this have an impact on your abilities, confidence and self esteem, it will also generate all that self destructive and damaging negative and critical self talk and inner mental chatter. 

Another downfall is when we won't be ourselves because we are led into believing that we should be something else. 

Not only does that go against the wonderful and unique person we are, it also prevents us from flourishing and growing both physically and spiritually. 

This happens when we lose touch with our true identity and real self because we get thrown off course because we more intent on changing what does not need to be changed and we try to conform to the pressures of what society and others thinks we should be.

If you have a negative self image, then you will need to change it if you want to break past those limiting barriers and become more successful, this will take time and effort but the long term benefits are well worth it. 

This means starting to change your self talk and from now on only say positive and constructive things about yourself. 

You can also try visualizing your ideal you, to do this find somewhere quiet where you won't be disturbed. It will help to play some soothing and relaxing instrumental music, then take some slow, deep breaths and allow your thoughts to drift on by.

Then when your mind is calmer, start to see your ideal you, the true authentic you of your own choice and not one installed by your past experiences or the opinions or beliefs of others. 

See yourself as being worthy and good enough, see a radiant, beautiful and confident, balanced, successful person and do this everyday until you become an outer reflection of that ideal inner you.

Discover your true powers 

If you exist, then you are powerful but you have to find your true power and you do this by controlling the way you feel. Often due to our limiting beliefs, our worries and concerns we lose our true powers and potential.

If you want to tap into your true powers, then you have to release your worries and come back into the present moment. 

This may also involve feeling good regardless of your outside conditions, you decide who you are and where you're going to and if you're going forward in a positive direction you're going somewhere better.

If you want to unleash your true potential, 

• Stop convincing yourself that there is something wrong with you
• Stop trying to improve and changing things that don't need changing 
• Stop wanting to be like someone else 
• Stop pretending to be something your not and put all your energy and focus into finding your purpose, learning new skills, unleashing your talents 
  

To get into the present you have not got to deal with the past, there is nothing wrong with you and you have already got everything you want, the only thing that is stopping you experiencing what you want is, how you're feeling, your focus of attention and not taking action steps to fulfill your goals and your true purpose.

This means letting go of any negative and focus, then follow your heart and do what makes you feel good, don't listen to other people's opinions unless it is positive and constructive advice.

Be who you are, do a little bit more of what you like doing, trust in your inner self and guidance and stop seeing yourself through the eyes of others.

Accept and love yourself 

Appreciate yourself and all the good things you have 

Learn to love and appreciate yourself and practice bit by bit on thinking thoughts that make you feel better, experiencing more things and activities that bring you joy, calmness and happiness and talk about all the good that can and will come your way.